I found out about 2 months ago that I was accepted to language school, but got all the official acceptance papers about 2 weeks ago... on May 15. The two couples that I heard about the school from have also officially been accepted :) I am super excited for this opportunity but in all honesty I am very nervous. I still am trying to figure out the English language, so the thought of learning two additional languages in the next two years is just daunting. I have decided to spend this year focused on physical therapy related terms as many of them are very similar to the english version because they are often based in Latin. Also this is an area that will not be covered at the school since not everyone will be a medical professional. This way I might be able to take the French board examination and do some volunteer work as a physiotherapist in France. Unfortunately due to the type of visa I will have I will not be able to work, but that probably good for me as I am really good at making myself too busy.
Speaking of trying to do more than I need to do, can I be real honest for a second? Ok so maybe I am going to be honest even if you don't want to hear it. I questioned this going to France this a lot while I was in Haiti this last time. I loved what I did in Haiti, I loved the students, I loved the idea of working on the campus, I almost kinda loved teaching. There was and still is a part of me that just wants to go to Haiti, I think it is because I feel needed there. I am not needed in France, I know without a doubt that the Lord WANTS me in France, but no one NEEDS me there. I like to feel needed, but it is such a dangerous desire to chase, especially in missions. As I begin to label myself as an ambassador of Christ to the Nations I need to put that desire away. I need to be even more diligent to point those that I have the opportunity to serve to Christ as their provider, healer, and Lord instead of me. Because I will mess up or leave and if they need me more than Him, I have failed in everything I am doing. So all that to say I am excited about France, I am excited to have a change of pace and a whole year surrounded by other missionaries preparing to go to the nations through language school. I am excited that there will be 6 people from our church at the school, and two of them are women of the Lord that not only can I follow them as they follow Christ, but that I can also share my fears and insecurities as I begin this new adventure with Jesus. So yes I am nervous, yes there is a part of me that just wants to forget I ever thought about missions, yes sometimes I just want to be comfortable. But... but my life is not my own. As much as I would like to pretend that I could just stay where I am (which I love) I can't. That would be disobedience, when I accepted Christ and have taken this journey, this adventure of life with Him as my Lord I agreed to surrender my life to Him. Now please don't read this as me not wanting to go, I want to go. I know that the Lord has amazing things to teach me, I know that although he doesn't need me in France or Haiti, he wants me there. I know that he is answering a prayer I have prayed for over two years... A prayer to take me on an adventure, that my life would not ever feel mundane, but that I would be ready and willing to follow Him into the crazy and uncomfortable. I love the Haitian people, every time I go I get more excited for the time that I get to live there. But here, here I am blessed as well. I love that it is going to be hard to leave. I love that I have a family, a church, a community group, and a job with co-workers and patients that will be hard to leave. Jesus has been faithful in these two years while I have been in Arkansas and it makes me even more confident that he will be faithful as I continue this adventure with Him in another country and another language.
Prayer Request
- That I would be able to learn the language and be able to make the sounds needed to speak French and then Creole fluently: I know this seems like a weird request, but I have been trying to learn some basics while in Haiti and some of the sounds I just don't understand how to do it. You know the people who say "tree" instead of "three" well there are lots of sounds that I say very wrong and I really want to be able to learn how to make those sounds correctly.
- The PT school: I got to talk more to the acting dean for the school this time about what my role would be. There are many possibilities but at this point it is understandably difficult to say exactly what that would look like since it is about 18 months away and lots can change in that time. She does still seem interested in me having a more permanent position at the school while also understanding my heart to train Haitians in the clinic. This is promising, and just praying for direction for both of us.
- Clinic partnerships: As I move forward in preparation to move to Haiti I need to find organizations or individuals who would be interested in helping to start and fund a Physical Therapy Clinic. I would really like to have an idea of where/when the first one will be by the time I leave for France, so that during that year my friend in Haiti can help me locate housing and materials for the clinic in that area.
- Preparation Trip: There should be a trip to Haiti with at least 2 of the Pastors from Fellowship and possible some other people that are interested in going to kind of vision where and how to best serve the Haitian people through rehabilitation services.
- VISA Process: I need to start the VISA process at the beginning of October, but need to get all the information and documents put together prior to that. That will be a very busy time as I transition out from my current job, and will be the clinical instructor of a PT student, and in the final stages of a move over seas. I am just trying to prioritize things so that there is no "emergencies" towards the end.
- Take time to prepare: This one is hard. Even though I move in 7 months it seems so far away because of the responsibilities in life right now. Please don't think that is a complaint, I love my job and I don't want to leave earlier than I need to. I just need to begin to prioritize a time focused on preparing the next steps. I don't know what this will look like yet but praying that I would see this time as a good stewardship of my time instead of something I can push off until tomorrow.
- Prayer Preparation: I also ask that you would come along side me and pray for the Lord to prepare the people and organizations I will have the opportunity to work with in Haiti. That I would have a spiritually discerning heart as I choose my "team" in Haiti. That the Lord would work prior to me coming to mature Haitians in Christ so that I would have a group of people that spur me on in the Lord and can also do the Lords work of making disciples through rehabilitation.
